Modern Qualifier 33 – CURATED by sclv

Curating this group was a bit of a moment of self-realization for me. I looked over my most-played tracks and the coincidence of two by the same title was too much not to pursue. As the rest of the group fleshed out, it hit me how much this is a continuing theme, and the more-so the more I age, of so many of the tracks that stick with me. (Another contended that just missed this group is the Mekons “learning to live on your own”). In some ways its articulated most clearly in the the Swift track — “you’re on your own kid, you always have been.” (always already alone, as it were). This is to say that loneliness is not a state of being, but a realization, that institutions and people and trodden paths you took for granted were always sort of artificial and conditional, and you’re finding your own way, even when you’re pretending you’re not.
I suppose this is something you’re supposed to figure out between 17 and 22 or so — and indeed the Swift track (immediately the standout to me from the most recent album) turns out to be a fan favorite (I think especially the “starved my body” line resonates with women of a certain age) but its also something you keep figuring out. No surprise then that three of the tracks are from relatively mature artists who started out in much more structured settings before settling into a personal sound — Marit in the teenpop of M2M, Merritt as an emerging star in then a much more burgeoning alt-country moment (her path has been relatively straight, while all that surrounded her sort of fell away), and of course Swift’s emergence from a conventionally marketed genre-performer into an idiosyncratic popstar with an ability to form intense connections with her legions of fans.
But in any case, its also a revelation one can keep having, differently, and more, over and over. And especially in the imposed isolation of the pandemic, and all the ways it forced me to lose some long social connections and find new ones, I felt this sort of “moment of fear and becoming” all over again with a new intensity, and these tracks were my companions in that.
I’m pleased by the reception the Tift Merritt track has gotten in particular — the whole album is my favorite of her career, just tremendous lyrics and range throughout, and a leap in the musicianship of the guitar work — the ringing overtones on this track in particular really knock it out the park. If it weren’t for the desire to stick to a theme in this group, I might well have nominated “Still Not Home” from the same album instead — a rocking rave-up overstuffed with riffs and flourishes that’s still infused with a wistful ache.
On Tiga and the DFA remix, I always just loved the track — sure, the buildup is slow, but its consistent in the increasing introduction of new elements which eventually transform it completely. Also, it eventually has cowbell.